24 December 2009

Ha ha, conservatives are up late on Twitter trying out this "humor" thing they keep hearing about

If you go to Twitter right now and search #leftistholidaysongs, you will find the biggest cesspit of humor fail of the year.

They're all getting together, and they are trying SO HARD. It's like "We've seen this 'funny' thing before, read about it, and we know liberals are naturally good at it, let's give it a whirl!"

Oh, the results...

Naturally, Erick Erickson is the biggest failure of them all:

First No Hell. #leftistholidaysongs

Ho ho ho, you got us there, because some liberals don't believe in Space God, but you know who else doesn't? Um, lots of libertarians. Many of whom you teabag with, retard. Next:

Have Yourself A Merry Little Partial Birth Abortion.#leftistholidaysongs

THAT'S NOT EVEN A JOKE, dumbass! No attempt at a clever play on words, nothing! Just a pathetic moron in Georgia pulling Rush Limbaugh's dingleberries out of his rectum and posting them on the internet!

Go Tell It On MSNBC.#leftistholidaysongs

Erick, sweetheart. You don't understand the concept here... When you "do funny," you need to have two things at your disposal:

1. A quick wit. We read your posts and know that this is in short supply in your general area.
2. A grasp of reality. It helps. Humor only works when it's based, at least in part, on reality.*

Instead, Erick is just starting with a Christmas carol, and then taking a word away and inserting a word he finds "liberal." Perhaps this works with the 70-and-below IQ set (RedState's readership, granted, is probably leaving puddles under their computer chairs right now, from the peeing and laughing), but not with smart people.

Let me give you an example. If we were doing #wingnutholidaysongs, I might post "Wingnuts Roasting On An Open Fire." Because A., brings back memories, you know, of Roman Lions, so, you know, LOL. B. It's a good pun! And that would be FUNNY.

Oh, shit, he accidentally did land one though, sort of:

Mary Did You Know You Have the Right to Choose.#leftistholidaysongs

Of course, I would have gone with "Bring Your Coat Hangers, Jeanette, Isabella," but that's just me.

Anyway, back to the FAIL. Erick Erickson is an insecure Southern redneck with penis issues, so he can't resist the gay jokes, because those are still funny to people over the age of thirteen, really:

We Three Queens. #leftistholidaysongs

See, um, correct use of pun but, again, wayyyyy too obvious. If you're going to make a gay joke, it has to be a GOOD gay joke. Like maybe...

"Carol of the Balls"

No, wait, sorry, that's a teabagger joke.

Sorry, just trying to help!


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