25 November 2009

Kirk Cameron tells UCLA science students that "evolution sux OMG," gets destroyed in seven minutes

Poor Kirk Cameron. He started with the best intentions, which went like this:


1. Be "Mike Seaver" on 80's teevee show, with best friend named "Boner."
2. Turn into scary retarded fundamentalist Christian.
3. Team up with dippy Australian pastor Ray Comfort, who believes that genetically modified bananas prove the geeeenius of God's creation, by fitting so comfortably in the hand, and being so easy to open, for monkeys. Also, they don't squirt into your face when you play with them, unless you've provided written consent that you're into that sort of thing.
4. Find underpants.
5. ????
6. Become Christian acting hero by portraying OMG CHRISTIAN WET DREAM Buck Williams in icky porn movie, "Left Behind."
7. Hand out copies of Darwin's Origin of Species on college campuses, replete with a special introduction written by the Australian Banana Pastor (also, bananas have pull tabs, just like Mountain Dew, and we KNOW God made Mountain Dew!), while explaining the wonders of Creationism to mean atheist science students, who will suddenly see the errors of their "science" and follow the 80's child star with the DSL.*
8. Profit!

Yeah, and it woulda been fine if those atheist scientists hadn't decided to use "facts" and other mean stuff to make him look like an ass. But you know those science people, making people do awful, degrading things with their brains, like thinking. So there was an exchange with a nice girl, which from start to finish was a whole banana hammock of Fail (also made by God), and which included this exchange:

Student: Science is based on evidence, where religion is based on faith.
Kirk: But Darwinism is extremely based on faith
Student: Not really, it's based on a lot of evidence.


Oh, how pathetic. Somebody needs to explain to these Christianist morons that every time they do shit like this, the world laughs at them even harder. They are SO out of their league every time they talk to intelligent human beings.**

Here's the video. The sound quality is awful, but it's worth it. There is so much more Kirk Cameron fail to watch.


(TMZ)

Okay, so here's the funniest part, to me. That was reported by TMZ, which has a wide audience, and of course, a comments section. So comment #12 presciently says this:

12. Get ready for alot of misspelled words using Caps Lock

For obvious reasons.*** And what do you know?

17. WOW SO MANY NON-BELIEVERS IN THE TRUTH. BUT I GUESS THAT'S WHAT HOLLYWEIRD IS ALL ABOUT. KIRK, (EVEN THO YOU NEED TO GET MORE KNOWLEDGE, WE ALL DO, IN EVERYTHING) KEEP DOING YOUR THING AND SPREAD THE TRUTH... IF JEHOVAH WITNESSES AND DUMB ALIEN BELIEVING SCIENTOLOGISTS CAN SPREAD WHAT THEY THINK IS THE TRUTH THEN SO CAN WE CHRISTIANS...EVERYONE ELSE, GO TO...WE'LL YOU ALREADY KNOW WHERE YOUR GOING....IF YOU DON'T, YOU'LL FIND OUT...

I STILL LOVE ALL...I CAN'T JUDGE... ;)

OMG YR GONNA BURN IN HELL GOD IS LUV I CAN'T JUDGE.

29. Keep up the good work Kirk. One day those who have not believed will be looking up from you know where and crying out to be saved and it won't happen. Yes, the big bang theory does exsist. God spoke and bang.....he created the heavens and earth.

When we're in heaven, you'll be sorry, lol. Jesus saves!

This one's a special kind of stupid:

45. he who has the son has life, he who does not have the son does,

does not have life!

don,t complicate the word of god, just love him.

don,t be haten!
l.n.

That ma,de a lot of sence 2,

me.

Anyway, I could cut and paste idiot comments for hours, and it's TMZ, so you know there are 40,000 comments, and I'm only on page four. So I'll just leave you with two more:

Sounds like the typical lame arguments on the web. Evolutionists will NEVER admit to believing it takes a great leap of faith, not to believe in Evolution, but to believe it happens the way they say it did. Why? Their beliefs are based on a guess. I used to be a snooty tooty evolutionist that "beat up on" creationists. During that time, I would NEVER admit that my belief was also faith based. But it was.

Proof that evolution can go backward. I once was snooty tooty, but now am snardy tardy. Amazing Grace &c.

47. HE WHO HAS THE SON HAS LIFE ITS A SHAME THEY CAN,T SEE THE SON OF GOD THE SECOND PERSON IN THE TRINITY!

GOOD JOB KIRK GOD BLESS YOU!

ALSO I REMEMBERED TO WEAR PANTS TODAY!

Anyway, like I said, lots more where that came from if you want to go read and laugh. There are also lots of great comments from smart people.

_______________________________________________________________

* Oh, you do too know what DSL stands for!

**This is why so much Christian evangelism focuses on illiterate, hungry people in the Third World who will listen to them because they need hope, and also food, and maybe these white people brought some.

***Anyone who's ever paid attention to the internet knows that when commenters are Conservatives/Evangelicals/Both, there will be a hell of a lot of bad grammar, misspelled words, and LOTS OF CAPS LOCK. This is because there's a lot of stupid on that side of the fence.

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